12/03/11.

I can't sleep. I want to, I do, but I can't. I can't bring myself to do it.
I have a few things I could do. I could try I guess. Or I could give up and try to stay awake, which will lead to more hallucinations and I'll probably be too afraid to leave my room again. Especially in the dark, because I might have to in the night still. But I can't.
I could curl up and stay awake or fall asleep trying to keep writing, but I'll probably fall asleep and the pen will be open and all the ink will soak through my notebook and ruin plenty of good research I did today on mental disorders.
That was fun. I'm discovering myself, what's in myself, learning all about it. Figuring out what may have caused it. I found a very nice site for it, heh. minddisorders.com. Wonderful place. So I discovered a lot today about myself and others, but also learned of a passion of mine. I guess it sounds strange, but I love learning about mental disorders and applying the knowledge.
If I go into psychology with as many problems as I have, would they even let me try and help people? Maybe they could study me, I guess, or I could study myself and others. There are plenty of things they've yet to discover about quite a few disorders. I could write different ideas as well, theories, and such, maybe eventually get published or something. That would be nice. I would just love to share my ideas.
I actually feel almost drunk right now. I can't think straight so my mind keeps jumping away and my sentences come out weirdly. It's almost embarrassing, but oh well, I'm going to post this anyway. :}
My eyes hurt and I keep twitching. I have an ache all down my neck and around the left side of my head. Also it's hard to even remember directions apparently, since I thought my left was right.
I'm going to attempt sleep. Woohoo.